No Resolutions, No Problem!

As 2022 rang in, many of us thought about resolutions for the new year. Those things we want to accomplish or improve. One of our previous blogs, Ready, Set, Goal! is all about setting goals. We discussed setting SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time-Oriented) goals, which is an effective way to set goals. Whether it is for resolutions, project goals, or anything else, SMART goals are the way to go.  

 

However, new year resolutions are not a must. Do not feel pressured to create lofty resolutions that sound nice. The whole “new year, new you” is motivating for some and that’s ok. If the mantra works for you, use it. January 1st gives some people a tangible reset, which may be needed. Just know, we can self-reflect and create goals at any time. We do not have to wait until the new year. 

 

There is an alternative to once-a-year goal or resolution setting. Some people love new year’s resolutions and if that works for you, please continue to create them. Using a quadrant method is another tool for setting goals and following through with them. This method allows you to continuously update or monitor the goals as well. Take a sheet of paper and fold it into fourths. Yes, I said paper. Each section will have a label: three months, six months, nine months, and 12 months or three months, nine months, 12 months, and This Week. You can set any parameter you want in each section. In each section, you will list your goals for that duration of time. The goals can even be mini-goals or steps to accomplish a larger goal, which may be listed under the 12-month section. The great thing about this is it allows for constant evaluation. There’s a saying, “you have to inspect what you expect”. If we are expecting certain things in our lives to happen, we must inspect our progress or lack of. The quadrant method allows for constant inspection. If the parameters are three, six, nine, and 12 months, then every three months, we need to be assessing our progress towards the goal and can even add new ones.  

 

The quadrant method also allows room to change your mind. You may list something to have done at the six-month mark, but time may show you that it no longer needs to be a goal for you. So, remove it. We can constantly evaluate goals instead of waiting until the end of the year. It even allows you to break up large goals. For example, a year-long resolution may be to get out of debt. Using the quadrant, you may put at month three to pay off $3000 towards debt and at the six-month mark, pay off $6000 total. If we give ourselves the entire year to accomplish the resolution, we may start on it in January because everyone is motivated then and then it may fall off in February or March. We might come back to the resolution in November once we realize the year is almost over and shame, guilt, and panic about not working towards the resolution set in. Using the quadrant method, we do not feel the pressure to create a “new me” at the new year, as we are constantly evolving during the year. There is ample opportunity to be present and intentional about what we want when using this approach. Again, we may change our minds about what we want, life happens. Do not hold yourself to resolutions you thought up in the wee hours of the night, especially if champagne was involved.  

 

Some months ago, a couple of girlfriends and I were chatting and the question “what’s on your bucket list” came up. Let me start by saying, bucket lists are fun and a cool way to talk about things you dream of doing. Create a bucket list, dream your biggest dream. I’m all for it. However, I did not have a bucket list. I do not feel like I need one, at least not as of today. This could change in ten years and I’m fine with that too. As for today, however, either I’m doing it or I’m not. For instance, if climbing Mount Fuji is on the bucket list, then when it is most fitting, it will end up on the quadrant, as this goal will be created in real-time because we are constantly updating the quadrant. If we are consistently working towards goals, the bucket list item will appear in one of the four quadrants when relevant.  

 

Sometimes there is a season of continuing with the status quo. You may be content, and nothing needs to be added or gained. That’s great. That is the whole point of self-reflection. To be mindful about what you feel, need, and want and act accordingly. I remember making a 30 before 30 list a good while ago. This is where you write down 30 things you want to accomplish before age 30. It was cool. I enjoyed doing it and seeing what all I accomplished. It is most interesting to see what I aspired back then. I will not be doing a 40 before 40 list. Mainly because I can’t think of 40 things. However, the goal is to be present and intentional and that will guide us to what we need and want.  

 

If new year resolutions work for you, continue. If you love making a bucket list or 30 before 30 list, have fun doing it. If you’re looking to try something new or different, try this quadrant approach and consistently evaluate it. You can set the parameters to be whatever you want them to be. Whatever approach you use, I encourage you to be intentional with your goal setting, consistently evaluate your progress, and most importantly, create goals that are truly meant for you. 

 

The content on this website is not intended to diagnose or treat, it is for informational purposes only. Please call our office at 404-618-1040 for an appointment or contact a mental health professional in your local area if you are seeking treatment.